Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Changes

Everyone talks about how having a child changes you. Changes your life. Changes everything. Mostly, you hear about all the "negative" changes. How much less you'll sleep, how little time you'll have to yourself or with your spouse...how your life will never be the same.

Sure, you hear these things and you know they're all probably true to some extent but you can never really understand until it happens to you.

Those changes are not what this post is about. This is about how having a baby has changed MY life for the better and made ME a better person. This evening, my husband and I were cooking dinner together and it occurred to me that we've changed, as a couple since Ryan was born. We're healthier in almost every way. Physically and certainly emotionally. It was a rough start for us after Ryan came, especially me, but we pulled through and our bond is stronger than it ever has been. Before Ryan, there's no way we would've cooked dinner together. More than likely, we would've had something like a box of mac and cheese. Since Ryan was born, I think we've both realized the importance of being healthy, both physically and emotionally. We spend more time together. Even though yeah, we are tired, our time in the evenings together is spent with meaning.

I have learned to appreciate my husband. When I say we were cooking dinner together, it was really me standing there talking while he cooked the sausage, made the pasta, and got plates and stuff ready. He is awesome and takes care of us. I don't think I would have found this appreciation had we not had a baby together. He is an amazing father and I aspire to be as great of a parent as he is.

Ryan has taught me patience. Love. Love. I knew love before Ryan, but there's a specific kind of love only your child can teach you. You learn it through their tears, smiles, when they find their little voices and you hear it for the first time. Love. My son has taught me what it is to love someone unconditionally, without fail.

Our lives are so enriched because of this tiny person. He's changed us, and everyone in our family, in ways we couldn't have imagined. Change is hard. No matter what, but in the end, sometimes its for the best. And while change is hard, sometimes the changes are good and you learn to appreciate the person you've become because of those changes.

I guess I've reached that point everyone talks about where I can't imagine my life without him. And I couldn't be happier about it.

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